“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity,
but of power, love, and self-discipline.”
~2 Timothy 1:7
I sat in the quiet of the rising sun, out in my garden. I prayed and pondered my life. thinking of all of the many twists and turns it has taken. I thought about who I am now, after healing from so many past wounds.
“You aren’t your story,” God said.
“What? What story?” I asked.
“You are not the events that have taken place in your life,” God answered. “You are not a “who”. You are more than a mom, a coach, a sister, a daughter, a woman who has been abused or hurt. You are more than a person who stopped drinking, who lost everything but found the most amazing riches of all. You aren’t even your name. You aren’t Jennifer.”
“I’m not? Then who am I?”
“You are not a who. You are a what,” God said gently. “Instead of getting lost in the story you tell yourself about you and your life, think about what you are,” He instructed. You are part of my creation. Your true nature is far greater than anything that has, or ever will, happen to you. Drop the stories. Then, drop the storyteller. Let your consciousness expand beyond the boundaries you’ve created. Remember what you are.”
“That may take me some time and effort,” I said. I’m not used to thinking in those terms.
“I’m here to help you,” God said. A songbird lifted her voice to the morning. I turned my face to the heavens and closed my eyes. I did my best to forget who I am and to be what I am. For a moment, I was at peace, no longer bound to my story, no longer attached to my ego. I was fully connected to God.